What Are You . . . Anyway?

1  If I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but do not have love, I have become a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 

2  If I have the gift ofprophecy, and know all mysteries and all knowledge ; and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. 

3  And if I give all my possessions to feed the poor, and if I surrender my body to be burned, but do not have love, it profits me nothing.
– 1 Corinthians 13:1-3

What Are You . . . Anyway?

Are you a lover? Or a "clanger?"  Are you something?  Or are you nothing?  I must admit that I am still a bit "clangy," and the Bible says that makes me "nothing" and that the work that I do, even though through my obedience God can do miracles so that others may benefit from it . . . I don't benefit at all.  Pretty harsh you say?  I don't think so.

Before I became a Christian I was not a nice person at all.  In fact, I pretty much hated everybody.  The events of my childhood and the consequences of my behavior as a youth, and on through my early 30's, left me with a warped view of the world, and an especially twisted opinion about God.  Basically I was full of hate, especially for myself, and I was headed down a steep path of destruction.

When God decided it was time, and He called me out of the "cozy" little hate-filled life that I had made for myself, He healed me of many things, and He delivered me of my 15-year drug addiction.  He left many things for me to work on though, and one of those was learning how to love . . . but first I had to learn how to forgive.  Forgive the priest for molesting me when I was 8; forgive those charged with protecting me and nurturing me in my childhood, but instead ended up hurting and scarring me both physically and emotionally; forgive my "friends" for all the things they convinced me to do that caused me to make bad decisions (hey, I had to blame somebody right?); but mostly I had to forgive myself.  I had a lot of self-hatred to deal with.  It has been a process, but now, with forgiveness from my past taken care of, He is continually working with me on learning how to love . . . everyone.

Everyone?  Are you kidding?  How can you possibly love everyone?  To tell you the truth, I don't have the answer to that one, but the Bible tells us that we are to love as Christ Loves us – and that means everyone.  In my own capacity it is impossible.  In my own limited understanding of "humanity" and what makes us tick, it cannot be done.  But God!  God can show us how, if we let Him.  He can bring us to a point of seeing beyond the obvious; seeing past the exterior; seeing His children (everyone), as equal to ourselves and equal in His eye.  He can show us how to love because He IS love.

So how about it?  Is there someone out there who just rubs you the wrong way?  Do you start to get angry at the mere mention of their name?  Clang! Clang! Clang!  Every time you call on God, He has to listen past all the clanging to hear what you are trying to say to Him.  I struggle with this Clang-itis every day, and I'll bet that most of you do too.  It's just our humanity, and our sinful, and selfish nature that we need to learn how to control.  We need to learn how to let God turn even the slightest bit of dislike into a pure and holy love – for everyone – even those who in our eyes, don't deserve it.  They are the ones who need to experience God's love the most . . . through you and through me.  Then, we will be Clang-Free, and that, will truly be something.

Prayer
Father forgive my prideful and selfish ways.  Forgive me for the times when I see Your children as enemies, and for thinking evil thoughts about them.  I need You to help me see them as You do.  I need You to show me how to love because I must admit that I am having a difficult time trying to do it on my own. I don't want to keep hurting You and sinning against You Lord, and I pray that I can start showing Your love to everyone, and that by doing so, it might just turn them towards You.  Thank You Lord, for loving me despite my clangy nature.

Have a blessed day everyone!

– Richard